The backyard is getting overrun by wasps in this late summer time. I’m not 100% sure but I don’t think there’s a nest on my property. Either they’re next door at the pigsty or they’ve got a nest in the nearby woods and, in either case, they come around my yard because of the direct sun and heat. My backyard gets lots of sun and the whole back side of the house is in direct sun most of the day. But yesterday there were several dozen wasps buzzing around the yard and back of the house. They haven’t had a go at me… but it’s still a bit unnerving to see them patrolling around.
With all the hurricane footage on TV, I’m just on reporter-being-blown-across-creation-for-our-amusement overload. They treat it as if it’s a duty. But at the same time, they act all amazed when they see other people walking around out there. They’ll run up and stick a microphone in someone’s face and say “don’t you know you shouldn’t be out here!” Practice what you preach news reporters. We can understand the severity of a storm without watching you attempt to talk into a microphone in 100 mph winds. It’s just dumb, and becoming cliché. Every weather event that occurs, you just know we’re hours away from water-soaked newscasters getting blown down the street.
I’m not sure what kind of sports fan this makes me, and I saw someone write about this just today as well… but I’m kind of enjoying the fact that the Blue Jays are currently not playing meaningful baseball. I can watch a game more relaxed. And I enjoy when they’re playing a few of the younger players that were just called up.
It annoys me how we always have to keep on top of billion dollar companies to not rip us off. After two years of an acceptable fee I had to pay Rogers for my phone, TV and internet, my discount came to an end and my bill shot up by almost 40%. Luckily, Bell sent an offer in the mail which I could quote to Rogers with the threat of leaving. When it was all said and done, I basically have everything I wanted from Rogers (losing a few channels I never watched anyway) and I’m now paying $5 a month less than when I was on the previous discount. So… do nothing, and get charged an extra 40%. Or basically haggle with them to keep it at a reasonable amount. I don’t think I should have to haggle with billion dollar companies. But I guess this business model is why they are, in fact, billion dollar companies in the first place.
Of course, then there’s the other kind of business model. Like, yesterday, with the wasps at their peak, I called a pest control company. I pushed the right number for wasps and explained my situation to the woman on the other end of the line. Happily, she says “oh let me transfer you to our expert on wasps.” I get voicemail… leave a message… and never hear from them again (this being 24 hours later). You’d think, if the person was away on vacation or something, they’d not transfer me to her. And if she’s not on vacation, I appear to be a low priority. Or perhaps the wasps have taken over the city… and I’m number six thousand on the message list. God help us all.
Evil Legs
Evil legs dangle
As they haphazardly meander
Carefree flying
Through the sky
No fear of us giants
If situated within their flight path
Even your face
An obstacle they expect will move
A yell from me
Drives great bears away
Panicking through the woods
Out of fear of being seen
But yelling at them
Little evil sky marauders
Brings on boredom
As they veer towards your nose
Nature’s thugs
Running the neighbourhood
An invading gang
Going as they please
I cower in fear
I hold up within my house
Fearing a waspy shiv
As evil dangly legs meander by my window
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